Chapter 6

“Stwoy time! Stwoy time! Yaaaay!” (Alt)

Yes that’s it… fall further down… down to where you can no longer even form the concept of escape. Let my cuteness lead you to the bottom of the hole of servitude… Give in to the cuteness… GIVE IN TO IT!!!!

I was currently surrounded by well over half of the palace staff as I sat on Fera’s lap. They couldn’t get enough of  “little Alty”, hell some of the servants were even giving wistful sighs or staring at Fera with jealously.

I had learned a lot in these five months, both about the world around me and how best to use my abilities, and some of the Vampeerus’ common sense.

Little stuff like how female is the naturally dominant gender and are the ones who initiate proposals/courtship to their mates/spouses… thanks again for that little shock mom.

That servants are different than slaves, servants are apparently better trained and better bred, sometimes even being a  Vampeerus… nobles tend to look down on using the “slave filth” for anything besides food though… seems stupid to me but oh well.

Or how it is usually seen as a taboo to drink from certain species among certain types of vampires… there was an animal incident in the palace involving my cut thump, some blood, and Fera absolutely losing her shit on a bat-monster-thing that was apparently my distant cousin somehow… I don’t like thinking back on that time…. He screamed a lot and loudly… I would have felt sorry for him, but he tried to eat me sooooooo…..

Oh and that every living thing has a natural weakness that I can now easily exploit, to the point that they don’t even see me as a food source anymore.

These fools are playing right into my hands… and soon they will be no more than my willing and eager pawns. MUHAHAHAHAHAhahahahahaha!!!!!!!

“Of course my prince, which story would you like?” (Fera)

She looked down at me and smiled. Fera might love story time more than I ever could, because for the last 3 months I always sat in whoever told the story’s lap. THAT caused one of the greatest cold wars I have ever seen between two people to occur between mom and Fera. Fera was currently winning the war though since mom’s duties as queen frequently took her out of the front lines.

“Dis one.” (Alt)

I tilted my head at the perfect calculated angle to make me appear both shy and eager, completely ignoring the round of sighs and gasps that came from the peanut gallery.

“Wead Dis one Fewa!” (Alt)

I could see Fera turn and blush slightly as she picked up the book on the different Vampeerus types, houses, and clans. This was going easier than I ever thought it would, and no one wanted to eat me! This was the GREATEST progress I have made in this world EVER.

“Ah….. O-of course my ang-… my prince I would be happy to read this book to you.” (Fera)

All according to THE PLAN…. This is working BEAUTIFULLY! I only wish I had thought of this before. This is GENIUS!!! I should’ve made THE LIST a year ago!!!

 

5 months prior…

 

Ok so I got a goddess who hates me, a goddess(?) whose on my side, and blood that makes me basically healthy chocolate-flavored crack. Oh and NONE of a vampires usual strength speed or toughness. So Alt, it’s decision time. No longer can I stay my loveable chaotic neutral… it is time to choose the way I’m gonna act. Will I go the hero route and try to solve the deep mysteries behind this world and the gods? Or should I go the villain route and inevitably get defeated by the exploitation of a minor but overlooked detail along the way?            …………………Wow both suck ASS……….. lets go wiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttthhhhhhhhh………….. The famous I-DO-WHAT-I-WANT-AND-IF-YOU-DON’T-LIKE-IT-DIE overlord’s route! The best of both worlds, I can help and spare people without them coming back to one day slay me, but I’m also not bound by any laws, morals, or ethics but my own, I’m free to steal, kill, and do any evil I want without any of that hero-guilt!!!!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…………. That felt good to clarify……… right in my nice little box, I fit…….

While doing my best to ignore the sounds Fera was making while she slept, I focused on the important first step I skipped out of surprise from being in a new world. Oh and fear, fear of being eaten alive was there too.

Time to make a plan, or at least a list of things I want to do. I tried it before, but that wasn’t really a serious list of tasks and goals. If I’m gonna do this I’ll need to get serious about it. New rules Alt, from now on anything that gets put on the list GOES no alternatives. It may take time, but I will make them happen. Next rule Alt, keep the list short, no more than 10 entries or I KNOW I’ll start to lose track or put things off. Ok my Last rule……… let nothing stand in the way of the list… of MY future… I will remove them by ANY means necessary…

…………..Baaaaah that’s WAY too heavy for me to get right now, hell I might not have the power to accomplish what I REALLY want… but I guess that means I’ll just put absolutes on the list…. That name doesn’t suite something that will play a major part in how I form my new identity…… I know I’ll call it THE LIST…. Yep all about the emphasis……….

Now what to put on first…

  1. Find a way to not get eaten… STOP ALL THE STARES IF POSSIBLE!!!
  1. Develop a strong core mentality… stop REACTING to everything, begin to ACT
  1. Learn to walk
  1. Practice talking (not too much too fast or others may be alarmed)
  1. Learn all I can about my surroundings
  1. Maintain my position of Authority…. Otherwise I’ll probably end up dead…

There that should do for now… clear realistic goals I can follow. Now if only I had a way to keep them memorized or recorded safely…. Sally damnit this is hard…

{I’ll bet. It looks like you’re in quite a jam there Alty.} (Sally)

SALLY!!! What are you-

{You called I answered, that simple. I DID tell you to cut down on using my name when you don’t need it. You should only call when me when you need me. Otherwise I wont have enough power to do much more than watch over you as your mauled by some sort of creature that wants that delish blood of yours.} (Sally)

YOU KNOW ABOUT MY BLOOD!!!

{Of course silly I am a goddess after all… your goddess to be specific. <3 } (Sally)

But I thought that the other one… you know the FIRST Sally was the goddess of this world, and she said you were, like, not actually real and that I made you. How can you be a goddess if all that is true?

{First Alty she is not, was not, and never will be the goddess of this WORLD. No god can. Secondly I am just as real as her, even if I’m not as powerful yet, and Helly only called me a fake because she was mad and jealous. And Lastly Alty, and this is the most important thing so remember it, even the divine lie. We just do it better than others, so much so it sometimes seems like truth. You shouldn’t trust anyone too fully, especially not the divine.} (Sally)

Then………. would you lie to me?

{If I thought it would help you, or keep you safe then yes. I will always prioritize your safety, even if it costs you your happiness. That’s my purpose.} (Sally)

That’s……. upfront I guess…… but can I trust your telling the truth now?

{……………..there’s no good answer for that…… I guess that’s just up to you Alty. Oh I solved your little problem, I added THE LIST (  XD   lol best naming sense in the world Alty I mean that…) to that status interface Helly gave you.  Whenever you want add or check something it will pop up automatically. Your welcome <3 } (Sally)

THAT’S PERFECT!!! I LOVE YOU SALLY!!!! YOU’RE A REAL LIFESAVER!!!!

{Aww don’t say things you don’t really mean, you might give a girl the wrong impression… oh looks like my time here is almost up, this took up a LOT of power…} (Sally)

WAIT BEFORE YOU GO!!!! HOW DO GODS USE POWER? WHERE DOES IT COME FROM? I need to know, especially if Hellatia is the type to hold a grudge….

{…………Those questions really aren’t for me to answer Altorus. All I can give you without putting you at risk is a word. Faith. If you want more you must find it on your own, because I will not speak of this again.

Goodbye for now little Arty… remember all I told you. It’s all important.} (Sally)

 

 

Wrapped in my covers and laying in my crib I looked once again at my room. It has been a while since Sally’s screen faded away. She gave me a lot to process, so much I don’t even want to think about it all. I figure I’ll just do what I planned for now and take Sally’s words as a helpful warning.

{ [THE LIST] }

{ 1. Find a way to not get eaten… STOP ALL THE STARES IF POSSIBLE!!! }

{ 2. Develop a core mentality… stop REACTING to everything, begin to ACT }

{ 3. Learn to walk }

{ 4. Practice talking (not too much too fast or others may be alarmed) }

{ 5. Learn all I can about my surroundings }

{ 6. Maintain my position of Authority…. Otherwise I’ll probably end up dead… }

{ 7. Learn to trust Sally, find out all I can about the gods }

 

I looked at the far corner of the room filled with all the new things I got from my birthday, and new shelves to store them, I wanted so badly to be able to USE half of this stuff. Hell that T.V. crystal thing has been taunting me in my dreams the nights that Fera’s noises don’t… invade… my dreams in oh so pleasant ways. It wasn’t fair that they wouldn’t even turn it ON for me……. Babies can watch things too, we can watch with the best of ‘em!

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa……………. I really don’t have any real strengths to speak of… except of course being a living source of what is apparently the best drug ever… which will probably get me killed and harvested if anyone else finds out about it……. Doing any of these is gonna be really hard.

I most have SOME other ability or trait that could be used as a weapon….

Status.

{ Name: Altorus Phantus    [abilities] [THE LIST] }

{ Race: Vampeerus (Phantu)    [traits] }

{Age: 1 year}

{ Strength: 3 } { Dexterity: 56 } { Endurance: 5 } { Survivability: 300 }

{ Intelligence: 302 } { Wisdom: 104 } { Charm: 10,547 } { Leadership: 2 }

…………………………Ummm why did only the stats I can’t use increase? I don’t know any magic so intelligence and wisdom just tell me how smart I am now…. I could have done that by myself……….. Leadership doesn’t work if your only follower can’t understand you…….. And all that charm probably just makes me a super cute baby right now, and I’m sure at least half of that is actually due to my blood and not my rugged, yet still caring, natural manly charm. It’s not like I can weaponize cuteness………

……….Weaponize…….cuteness……..

No one wants to kill cute things……… Everyone wants to protect and take care of cute things, it’s in the inherent  nature of people. A nature I can exploit…

I have over 10,500 charm right now…

Time to update the list!

{ [THE LIST] }

{ 1.          Find a way to not get eaten… STOP ALL THE STARES IF POSSIBLE!!! }

{ 2.          Develop a core mentality… stop REACTING to everything, begin to ACT }

{ 3.          Learn to walk }

{ 4.          Practice talking (not too much too fast or others may be alarmed) }

{ 5.          Learn all I can about my surroundings }

{ 6.          Maintain my position of Authority…. Otherwise I’ll probably end up dead… }

{ 7.          Learn to trust Sally, find out all I can about the gods }

{ 8.          Weaponize cuteness… use my charm to overcome #1 }

{ 9.          Gain loyal followers ready and willing to die for me if need be }

{ 10.       Don’t die }

 

 

2 months later

“here Altrous put your hand on this, there that’s enough we wouldn’t want the ink to be uneven and smear now would we, good. Now just press your hand right here for Mommy, little Alt.” (mom)

Mom slide a paper over that looked like some type of formal contract. I figured that this must be some citizenship, or important royal thing so I let her do what she had to do, which was a lot of document shuffling and the coating my hand in ink thing. It all seemed like legitimate legal work that a mother did out of concern for her sons future, that is until I actually read the document she put in front of me.

It read: I Natasha Nosferatusa, in sound mind and sound body, do pledge my eternal love and hand in marriage to Altorus Phantus. Our love shall be eternal and unending, as we shall not suffer any binds nor allow any obstruction to hinder our love. Together eternally so I do pledge.                                                     I Altorus Phantus, in sound mind and sound body, do pledge my eternal love and hand in marriage to Natasha Nosferatusa. Our love shall be eternal and unending, as we shall not suffer any binds nor allow any obstruction to hinder our love. Together eternally so I do pledge.

And when she pointed at where she wanted me to press my hand. It was the place for my sigil, signature, or the appropriate equivalent. Her portion next to it was already filled out.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TRYING TO GET A BABY TO SIGN!!!!! Mom I know your affection for me was always a bit… beyond… what was normal for a mother towards her son, but this is MONKEY-SLINGING-BATSHIT-CRAZY!!!!!! I’m one and use like a handful of words and you want to MARRY ME ALREADY!!!! YOUR PROBABLY OLDER THEN FERA IS SQUARED!!! If you feel you HAVE to do something like this then have some FUCKING PATIENCE and wait till I’m old enough to have gone through FUCKING PUBERTY!!!!

I looked up at her and gave her the EYES, the ones that look like a sad kitten-puppy hybrid after finding out it was different from everyone else. the EYES made Fera start sobbing and apologizing to me for nothing when she first saw them. They were the first real weapon I had in the WEAPONIZE CUTENESS PLAN. They were also damn near irresistible

“Mama. Nwo.” (Alt)

“Hic… Alt honey don’t look at Mommy like that… Hic…Hic… I just… Hic… I jusd… Hic… WAAAAHHHHNNNN!!!!!!” (mom)

Mom starts to break down in the middle of her explanation, and ends up hugging her knees to her chest and bawling like a little kid. She keeps rocking and saying that I don’t have to be sad… that or Ike is half mad, it’s really hard to tell between all the sobs and crying. I can’t continue watching her like this so I decide to let her work herself out of this in private.

Ahhhhhhh…… the EYES…. Gets ‘em every time. Whelp nothing to do but get up and go get Fera, mom looks like she might be here a while.

As I get up, I push of the floor with both hands and titter back onto my feet, the method of standing I perfected after a week of intense practice. The only problem was I forgot that there was a legally binding contract in front of me… and my right hand had ink coating its palm…. And mom made sure the place I was supposed to mark was RIIIIIIIIGHT in front of me….

OH FUCK……………….

“I KNEW YOU LOVED MOMMY!!!!” (mom)

Before I could even try to run or smudge the hand print both the contract and I were safely in mom’s custody. Me in a suffocating hug, and I have absolutely NO idea where the marriage contract went…

Ahhh I’m getting used to blacking out like this….

{ [Ability] learned: Charming Aura }

{ [Ability] learned: Empathic Acts }

{ Charming Aura: due to your massive amount of charm, your body now produces special chemicals that cause living things to desire your attention, approval, and favor. Further increases charm. Caution this ability is automatic and uses a percentage (10%) of your remaining mana, in the case no mana is available mana regeneration speed is lowered until mana pool is full again }

{ Empathic Acts: due to your ability to sway the emotions of others you will now be able to freely control your own emotional displays. This ability also increases your ability to sense the emotions and feelings in others actions. Caution this ability is automatic and will alter how you perceive concepts such as sincerity and fallacy permanently. }

…………….. Oh…………… Those will be……………………… Useful……………………

And the world faded out…. For the twelfth time…..

 

The next day I looked mom right in the eyes, walked over to where Fera sat getting ready for story time, and climbed onto her lap. Still holding eye contact I clutched at Fera’s dress, opened my mouth and said….

“Fewa…. Ywes!” (Alt)

Fera’s eyes light up, and she had a full facial blush as she started mumbling something to herself. Mom just stood there dumbstruck for the entire story time, a broken smile stuck on her face. it was UTTERLY creepy, but i did my best not to let that show.

Later Fera and mom got into one of the most serious arguments I had ever seen, and I don’t think they settled it……..

Present

“Yaaaaaaaahhhhhnnnn” (Alt)

“oh dear, my ang- my prince are you sleepy?” (Fera)

“Nwighty………. Nwight…….. Fewa………..ZZZzzzzzzz” (Alt)

“Nighty-night to you too my angel…” (Fera)

“he is just the CUTEST THING EVER!!!!” (???)

“Did you hear him yawn? I want to listen to that sound every day right before I go to bed!” (???)

“Altorus is just unbelievably adorable! I just want to hold him and never let him go… EVER!!!” (???)

Their just to easy. It’s like taking money from a blind, lame, and dumb old man…. Who was dying… and facing the other way… and also unable to hear anything not shouted at him…

This just isn’t even in the same language as the word fair. I can’t believe that I thought these people could EAT me and drink my blood… If I started crying they’d all probably have panic attacks and beg for forgiveness… they kinda remind me of puppies… simple loyal puppies…

Then I felt the near-tangible blood thirst that said Fera was pissed, but didn’t want to do anything were her “angel” could easily see it and start crying or, you know, give the look I always give when that level of AURA-OF-PURE-PAINFUL-DEATH is near me. It’s a lot like abject terror, mixed with a dash of pride in the knowledge that the one who can make that basically would do ANYTHING for me. But it’s mostly abject terror.

“Silence… The angel is sleeping and you will not disturb him… is that understood?” (Fera)

”””YES!””” (everyone else)

Ahhhhhhh I think I can cross some things safely off THE LIST now…

{ [THE LIST] }

{ 1.          Find a way to not get eaten… STOP ALL THE STARES IF POSSIBLE!!! }

{ 2.          Develop a core mentality… stop REACTING begin to ACT }

{ 3.          Learn to walk  Walk better }

{ 4.          Practice talking (not too much too fast or others may be alarmed) }

{ 5.          Learn all I can about my surroundings }

{ 6.          Maintain my position of Authority…. Otherwise I’ll probably end up dead… }

{ 7.          Learn to trust Sally, find out all I can about the gods }

{ 8.          Weaponize cuteness… use my charm to overcome #1 }

{ 9.          Gain loyal followers ready and willing to die for me if need be }

{ 10.       Don’t die }

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