Chapter 1

21,312,481,092,581,904,910,982,410,485,829,345,129,038,410,432,883,415,414,574,875,624,315,767,878,665,789,011,465,185,186,5782,657,894,654,825,678,965,487,246,578,261,876,752,987,675,279,861,895,685,652,370,198,790,167,865,091,478,422,296,520,654,874,989,261,879,691,896,261,784,624,559,872,397,542,876
21,312,481,092,581,904,910,982,410,485,829,345,129,038,410,432,883,415,414,574,875,624,315,767,878,665,789,011,465,185,186,5782,657,894,654,825,678,965,487,246,578,261,876,752,987,675,279,861,895,685,652,370,198,790,167,865,091,478,422,296,520,654,874,989,261,879,691,896,261,784,624,559,872,397,542,877
21,312,481,092,581,904,910,982,410,485,829,345,129,038,410,432,883,415,414,574,875,624,315,767,878,665,789,011,465,185,186,5782,657,894,654,825,678,965,487,246,578,261,876,752,987,675,279,861,895,685,652,370,198,790,167,865,091,478,422,296,520,654,874,989,261,879,691,896,261,784,624,559,872,397,542,878
21,312,481,092,581,904,910,982,410,485,829,345,129,038,410,432,883,415,414,574,875,624,315,767,878,665,789,011,465,185,186,5782,657,894,654,825,678,965,487,246,578,261,876,752,987,675,279,861,895,685,652,370,198,790,167,865,091,478,422,296,520,654,874,989,261,879,691,896,261,784,624,559,872,397,542,879
……………………WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!!!!
It has been a while now and I must say I like this black place, I REFUSE to think too deeply about where it is, a lot better than the void. First off there is sensation here, I can feel and sometimes hear, my surroundings. Even that drum that fades into the background when I don’t concentrate on it, it is NOT a heart. It can’t be because I am all alone in here… yeah that’s it…        The only real downside is there is once again nothing to do. That is where my good friend numbers, who I never wanted to see again, came back into play. That is until everything started to move, shake, and generally go crazy here.
…Wait, is that a light? Oh cool so I CAN see. That’s one question solved…
…But wait if there is light here and everything is moving………..  Oh Sally I don’t want to see THIS as my first sight in the new world! Eyes closed. Ok. There problem solved.
………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….
That was the WEIRDEST sensation ever… I can’t even put into words how that will haunt me for the rest of-
SMACK!
“WAAAAAHHHHHHNNN WAH WAAAAAAHHHHNNNNN” HOLY SWEET MOTHER OF SALLY WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!!!!!! That HURTS!!!
I open my eyes to see a giant. She was a much better first sight in this world with her regale features that seemed sculpted and long red hair tied in a tail, especially considering… the alternative, and I might have even liked her if she had not just HIT MY ASS WITH WHAT FELT LIKE A BAT!!!!!
Around me is a fairly well furnished room with high quality wood furniture and stone walls.
“!#!$%@ !$$#@%$!$! #$&&$^#%@ !#$!VE. @!@!Ly ma#$ @!$!ne”
…….Ummmm what? I thought I got some type of language ability from Sally, so WHY CANT I UNDERSTAND THIS! Oh shit did Sally take back the powers? If she did I am SO screwed… if I cant even understand these people I won’t be able to learn anything, and I SUCK at learning new languages… at least I think I do… probably.
“!@!ty %$$!$!$me #$$@$lty @#is t!me. H@nd me m% b@b% ! w@nt t@ $ee him.” Garbled a woman laying on a bed. She looked even better than the one holding me, but was covered in sweat and panting… for some reason I REFUSE TO THINK ABOUT!
… Ok that almost sounded like actual speech there… alright remember the first rule of the Hitchhikers Guide. Just DON’T PANIC. Gotta play it cool, let the situation unfold around me and act like any baby would. I got this!
“Of cou$e Madam here you are.” (red hair)
She passed me along to the woman on the bed.
“Oh you seem attentive little one. Do you recognize me? I’m your mother.” (bed woman)
Wow… Ok note to self don’t doubt Sally’s skills. I just learned to understand an entire language before I even ate or slept for the first time. That has to be like some kind of baby record. …Wait isn’t this were a baby gets feed for the first time? Oh man this is gonna be awkward… is it weird I think my mother looks hot? Oh Shit I am gonna need some SERIOUS therapy when I am old enough to talk…
“Madam I must say your son looks quite… desirable…” (red hair)
………Why is she looking at me like I’m ice cream? WHY IS SHE LICKING HER LIPS!!! Hey mother can we like ask the creepy scary lady to leave now? Please? It will earn you serious mom points with me!!!
“He does look rather tasty doesn’t he? Almost like one of those virgin prey, but somehow… better” (mother)
“WAHHN!” WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK MOM!!!!! Ok I’d like to go back to not understanding them now, please! This is more horror than fantasy. Sally learn your genres before making your “Different World” pitch!
“Look he is even struggling, it’s cute like he can understand us and is trying to escape like prey” (mother)
…………………I’m not gonna die for tricking Sally right? I mean she is kinda a goddess, but she can take a joke or to right? She wouldn’t reincarnate me into some weird family of sadistic cannibal models would she? I mean Mom looks serious… and kinda hungry… and I don’t want to die again when I’m not even one day old yet.
“That aside Madam, are you going to have a public ceremony or a private one?” (red hair)
NICE SAVE LADY!!! I know we kinda got off to a bad start, what with you smacking me and all, but for saving me from being eaten I forgive you! Now can you please take me away from psycho-mom here?
“I feel a private ceremony would be best. Invite only nobility from our faction and the queen.” (mother)
“Yes madam” (red hair)
I watched in horror as my savior walked out of the room shutting a strong looking stone door behind her.
“GAHH! GAHH! GOOHHNNN!” Don’t leave me alone with her! Please! Come back!
“My, you are rather energetic aren’t you? Well I really should put you in your room while I get ready for your ceremony, but just looking at you makes me wonder… I guess one taste wouldn’t hurt if no one knows about it right?” (psycho-mom)
OH SALLY, PLEASE COME BACK AND SAVE ME RED HAIR! SOME ONE, ANYONE, HELP!!!!

  
I am now lying in my crib in my own room. Its soft, and the room is nice like a scaled down version of the one I was in before, but that doesn’t really register right now.
I have been born less than a day and have already been molested. My own mother licked me… repeatedly. And her eyes while she did it…
I shiver in the covers wrapping me.
I need an adult… an adult that doesn’t want to eat or “taste” me… If this is Sally’s revenge for my little trick I am never going to forgive her, hell I will find a way to get back at her. Putting me in the Void I can forgive, even taking my memories I could move past, but THIS this was downright terrifying and will probably haunt me forever…
I shiver again and try to huddle deeper in the covers.
Ok so I know that the language thing works, it just isn’t instant… now to check out my status and stuff to see what I got to work with…
……………………………………………….
Open status…… Open menu…… Open interface… Activate… On… Go Go stat menu… Maybe I have to say it out loud…………………
“GAH… GEH… GOOH… WAHH… WAAHN… GEGEH…”
………………………………………………
Well SHIT! I have no idea how to use this… well time for plan B…

  
SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY! SALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
{STOP!!! DAMN YOU STOP!!!}
Oh cool that worked. I didn’t know how to prey to you or if you could even respond but I’m glad that calling out to you did the trick.
{YOU’VE BEEN CALLING ME FOR 2 FUCKING HOURS JUST SAYING THAT STUPID NAME!!!!!}
Hey your name isn’t stupid Sally, I think it’s pretty and suits you very well.
{MY. NAME. IS…  GRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! I HATE YOU! I WISH I NEVER PICKED YOU!!!}
Grrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaa is a weird name I think you should stick with Sally…
{I! YOU! GRRR! HUMPH, Fine call me whatever I don’t care anymore you little shit… what do you want anyway?}
Oh just two questions. 1 How do I use those powers you gave me? And 2 did you reincarnate me into this family on purpose?
{Firstly your powers activate with mana so you have to will that into what you want to happen, for some things like your language ability it happens naturally over time, but that isn’t the case for the menu. For the second thing, no I didn’t truth be told I don’t even know where you are or what family your talking about, you are blocked from the sight of the gods for some reason. I kinda thought you just faded from existence until I heard someone praying only that name over and over again…}
So follow up question… what’s mana and how do I use it?
{*sigh* Mana is the life force energy present in all things, if you look deep inside yourself, like with meditation, you should find a sort of energy that you can move if you try. It probably won’t work the first few months of trying but you’ll get it eventually.}
GREAT! Thanks Sally! Man you have no idea how relieved I am to hear all that… especially now that I know I don’t have to plot the destruction of your entire religion for revenge… BYE SALLY!
{WAIT! WHAT WAS THAT SCARY THING YOU JUST CASUALLY SLIPPED IN! YOU WEREN’T SERIOUS RIGHT! RIGHT! HEY ANSWER ME YOU MORTAL FU-}
Ah messing with Sally always brightens my mood… especially now that I don’t have to do everything in my power to get revenge on her. That would have been such a hassle, and might even take up all my time here… Oh well no use dwelling on the ifs that never happened, might as well try this mana thing out now. I got nothing better to do.
“Hello my sweet… DELICOUS… baby boy!” (psycho-mom)
Oh Sally please no… not again, not again… maybe if I don’t move or react in anyway she’ll leave… Yeah like a T-rex! mom is just like a T-rex…
“Awww are you happy to see me? Well I have a surprise for you…” (psycho-mom)
Don’t flinch. Don’t flinch. DON’T FLINCH. If you flinch she will see it and know that you’re afraid. Mothers, T-rexes, and dogs can all sense fear. You must not show any FEAR. JUST HANG IN THERE ME!!!!
“We are going to your induction and birth ceremony! There you’re going to meet all the important people and if they like you, you get a name! Isn’t that exciting little one!”
“WAH WAHHN?” If they like me? IF?            ……………….Ummm what happens if they don’t like me… Oh Sally, does that mean that you EAT me… well I’m likable right? Nothing to worry about, I mean who DOESN’T like babies right? RIGHT?
  

Oh Sally am I in deep shit…
I am currently in the arms of this world’s worst mother looking out at a grand ball room filled with fancy and immaculate furniture, decorations, music and people dressed like medieval royalty from our place at the long dining table. Everyone here looks like they either model or work in the major film industry and they all seem to be looking down on and sneering at each other when they think no one else is looking. Worst of all is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. With long raven black hair, the face of an angel, and a body with the perfect proportions neither too much nor too little, all complimented by a long silk gown that looks like it was molded onto her body. She is sitting right next to us and she is looking at me with that look mom had right before the “licking” incident. Well to be fair all of these people have given me hungry looks from time to time, but they always go back to talking or sneering or something and look away.
JUST. NOT. HER… I would be overjoyed if someone like her looked at me with this much desire if only it wasn’t so THAT LOOKS DELICIOUS, and I was, you know, not also a baby.
Ok I would like to go back to my crib now… not that this hasn’t been fun and all but… you people scare the EVER LIVING FUCK OUTTA ME!!!!!!               Sooooooooo……
“Ah, here are the servants with the refreshments. I was beginning to wonder if I would be able to sample the Malcreek’s famous spiced blood tonight!” (???)
Uhhh…. Did he just say spiced BLOOD?
At that moment I noticed a group of people walking in carrying plates with multiple glasses filled with red liquid each and wearing subdued cloths. They all had a collar of some sort around there necks and had glazed over eyes, each walked near and placed a glass before the seated noble looking people then took a step back.
I watched with equal amounts fascination and fear as those seated drank what must be this rumored spiced blood stuff and saw that some had teeth that elongated into fangs as they drank. That was when a blurry faded memory surfaced and what was happing clicked in my mind.
Fangs, blood, and amazing looks… By Sally they are all Vampires! Wait if they are Vampires… and mom is a vampire… that means… Oh Sally up in heaven please by all that is, was, or ever shall be please PLEASE don’t let us SPARKLE…. 
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